mot

do you ever seek companionship? she does. it's like she's tired of the mediocrity of it all. she just wants something more and better for herself. its understandable that she can't obtain the unobtainable and it's alright that she can't them right off the bat. but its the little things that get to her. the within reach ideas and desires that come so easily for the next person but not for herself. she gets frustrated yet she's tired of being that way. she's tired of reaching for something that should be so easily grasped yet as soon has her fingers and the idea touch, not even for a milli-second. it slips through her fingertips as if it were never there to begin with. she just wants someone to talk to on the phone. someone who GETS her. no not even that. make her laugh. make her smile. argue with her. give her something to talk about. she's tired of talking and contemplating to herself...not that she's crazy or anything. but being alone and lonely have combined and it's wearing on her. she doesn't want to be dramatic but it's weighing on her sanity. of course she would want things as they used to be but she knows that's not possible. so why not give her the least amount of what she had. why not provide some security that would comfort her to where she's not relying on something else to be her anti-depressant.

the time is now.

...to be continued.